Tip: In Actual Practice, Anyone You Send Work to Will Read Fifteen Pages

You know how agents, publishing houses, and editors often tell you to send a query letter only? And then you're all worried, because even if you write a kick-ass query letter, how can they possibly evaluate your work or your writing on the basis of a one-to-two page letter? Well, an agent who was visiting a class I was in long ago told us all, "In actual practice, anyone will read fifteen pages," and I have found that to be true. There is one agency, Jabberwocky, that goes on and on in its listings about how it only wants a query letter, any queries with accompanying manuscripts will be thrown away unread, etc. Well, that's fine for them. Maybe you don't want to be working with them anyway! But for sending work to anyone else, don't sweat it. You can feel safe sending a query letter plus fifteen pages. It won't put anyone off. Of course, always send a SASE for their reply, and if you need the fifteen pages back, send adequate postage for that. If you don't (and most of us don't in this computer age), just tell them in the query letter that there is no need to return the sample. (But still toss in a SASE for their reply no matter what.)

As always, good luck!

I'm Writing as Fast as I Can . . .

My little fingers are sore (really!). My agent is interested in seeing a partial manuscript for The Suspicious Room, which, as you all know, is basically less than one step removed from a rough draft, even if there are more than 50,000 words for it now. (Writing is typing. That's how you make novels grow. That's how I got that many words on the page.) But boy, does what I have need to be cleaned up and made presentable. And I told her I'd do it ten days! Can we all say, "overly optimistic"? But I was excited. So that's what I'm up to. Hope to have more news soon. Also I'm beginning to plan teaching gigs for this year - will post plans for that when final! How do you all like the idea of "Flash Fiction Boot Camp"? I think that could a fun class.

And We're Back

I tried to Audblog from Connecticut, but I think I didn't "press 1 to post," hence no cheerful message appeared here. But it was fun - and cold! Mehran got the most questions of any of the directors in his group at the Director's View Film Festival, and there was an excellent turnout. Also we spent some time with our friends Philip Herter (a terrific writer, writes for both Mexican and U.S. publications) and his brilliant architect wife, Judy Choi, in Manhattan. Which was also cold. Philip and Mehran smoked cigars and made crepes. I played with Philip and Judy's adorable two-year-old, Emmanuelle. (They've heard all the jokes on that one already.) But little Emmanuelle had a cold, sniff, sniff, cough, cough, sneeze, sneeze, wipe, wipe, which I seem to have picked up. So, with sore throat, I am signing off.

Except not before I tell you that I have now finished The Subtle Knife, the second volume in Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials series, and man is this guy a walking ad for using the imagination. This is one of those sets of books classified as young adult but terrific for everyone. Makes me want to read his inspiration, Paradise Lost.

And for Tomorrow . . .

My favorite quote in the world.

"Hail Bishop Valentine, whose day this is;
All the air is thy diocese."

-- John Donne, on hearing that two of his friends had just been married on Valentine's Day

For Today, New Flash Fiction: Friday the 13th

Friday the 13th

Sebastian's friend Tigris the belly dancer was a pagan, which surprised him because he thought only lesbians were pagans.

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Anyway, he had never met a pagan until he came to UC Berkeley from Rodeo. After Intro to Psych Tigris told him that Friday the 13th was actually a lucky day.

"Because there are thirteen lunar cycles in the year, and Friday is named after Frietag, the Germanic goddess of love," she said. "It was the Christians who spread all that stuff about Friday and 13 being unlucky."

"I thought it was because Christ died on a Friday," said Sebastian.

"Well, exactly," said Tigris, with a swish of her ankle-length skirt and a jingle-jangle of her jeweled bracelet. "Why are you trying to carry both those pumpkins?" They were for an experiment in Microbiology. Sebastian didn't want to go into it. "Here, I'll take one."

She walked him to class, jangling. "So it's your lucky day," she told him.

"Right," he said, looking at her out of the corner of his eye. He liked her black hair.

She caught him looking, sighed, and handed him the pumpkin.

"Dude," she said, and he could feel her breath on his face, "It really is time to get lucky."

"Okay," he said blankly.

She sighed again and jingled away. He was in the middle of a pumpkin before he realized what she meant and ran out of class after her.

Dishy, Trashy Publishing World Gossip

Okay, I don't usually propagate gossip (oh, who am I kidding?), but this was just too juicy to pass up: Why Naughty Nannies Got Badly Spanked At Random House. It's about Random House's cancellation of the second book by The Nanny Diaries authors. It's almost unheard of for a publishing house to pass or cancel on a second book when a first one was as hugely successful as The Nanny Diaries. But it's interesting in that it's a snapshot of what's up with the publishing industry now - how some houses are trying to keep a limit on some of the selective giant advances and overblown expectations that have been part of getting it into the trouble it's in in the first place. And that's not necessarily a bad thing, although in the short term it may mean that authors should expect less money. And what's the moral of the story? Something along the line of "Someone who is nice to you but not nice to the waiter [or the editor, or the publicist, or the editorial assistant, or the agent's secretary] is not a nice person." I still believe that behaving professionally and courteously to everybody will serve you well in the end. In writing and publishing, as in most industries, everybody talks to everybody, and everybody finds out everything. (Hey, look what we all just found out.)

Going to Be in the NYC or Stamford, CT Area?

Then come on over to the screening of my husband's award-winning short, The Hundredth Monkey, at The Director's View Film Festival on this coming Sunday, Feb. 15! It's paired with three other shorts between 20 and 30 minutes long on a sort of general sci-fi Matrix-ey mind-exploration theme. The program starts at 7:45 at

Norwalk Community College
188 Richards Avenue
Norwalk, CT

We'll try to find a good bar afterward . . . any suggestions?

Tip: You Can Spend Money on Your Tools, It's Okay

Artists of all kinds think of spending money on the tools they need to practice their craft, and what's more, make it fun and pleasant and easier to practice their craft, as self-indulgence. It's the last thing on the budget list. But you know what? You can't make art without the right tools. So stop that now!

Of course some things, like a laptop for a writer or a new instrument for a musician, can be a major investment. But they should still be a priority. When you get yourself things like this, as well as the supporting tools that go with them (for writers, maybe a copy of Writer's Market, or the fee for class that you think might be helpful, or whatever) you are letting yourself know that you are "really" a writer, and I promise you that your work will respond in kind.

Even little things make a difference. You are allowed to surround yourself with a pleasant atmosphere when you write, whatever that might mean to you. Now, I'm not sure I support what's behind those writers who say things like, "When I write, I must have the shell I found on the beach with my aunt in 1963 before me. I need a cup of tea, peppermint, not chamomile, and white curtains. Baroque, not Renaissance, music must be playing at a volume not louder than . . ." I think that's often our subconscious getting us to procrastinate. Natalie Goldberg says it pays to be flexible and she's right.

But, sometimes a few objects make the difference between writing being fun and a chore. If you write longhand, get yourself some pens you like. You don't have to make a big deal out of it, just get them. If you really want to mocha instead of the tall drip (whoever thought the world would be full of people ordering "tall drips?") while you write at the cafe, hey, get one. If you want a fancy blank notebook with gold leather stamping, get one. (I personally have a new pink Macskin for my old reliable G3 that I just love. I will love it even more when I have put sequins on it - but that's me.)

The message is: get yourself what you need. Do not feel guilty.

Oh, and by the way, Glimmer Train's got a contest deadline coming up, Short Story for New Writers. I can't enter because it's for writer's whose work has not been published in anything with a circulation of over 5,000, but maybe you can. If you want!

Tip: To MFA or Not to MFA?

Ah, yes. This is one that many new writers lose sleep over. MFAs can cost a lot of money and time. But do they really teach you anything? It depends on who you ask.

Here's my opinion: It really doesn't matter if you get an MFA or not. There are other factors that influence your success as a writer much more. Many very successful writers have MFAs. Many do not. It's a matter of figuring out what is personally right for you.

I am very happy to have my MFA, and I had a good experience getting it. I went to a low-residency program (becoming more and more popular now, these programs allow you to keep your job and your life and only be on campus limited times during the year) at Warren Wilson College. I went to the program because I wanted to make sure I had deadlines that forced me to write. I also met some wonderful fellow-writers who have been wonderfully supportive, and made some good contacts with successful fiction writers. Some people complain of heirarchy and cliques in MFA programs (i.e. who gets to sit at Tobias Wolff's table?) but there was little if any of that at Warren Wilson.

Some people talk about a particular kind of literary writing, what one friend of mine called the "fly-fishing-with-my-alcoholic-father story," being the only kind encouraged at MFA programs. I did not find that at Warren Wilson but have heard that complaint leveled at other programs. You might want to see what writers came out of various programs to see what you think.

Now then, would it make you stand out to an agent or editor to say in your query letter that you graduated from Iowa? Well, yes, it probably would. But if they don't think there is a market for your work, they won't take it on, no matter where you went, and if they do think there is a market for it, they will, no matter whether you have an MFA or not, or where you got it. There are many other things - publication in literary reviews, acquaintances with name authors who might blurb your work, to say nothing of the actual quality of your work, that will also make you stand out to a potential agent or editor. And there are ways to get these things without getting an MFA - networking, goint to readings, writer's groups, writer's conferences, to name just a few.

So, the bottom line is, what do you want? If you want deadlines, continual feedback, and a community of writers, and you have the time and money, you may want to investigate MFA programs and see if one is right for you. (Extension programs at universities, like UCLA and Berkeley, can offer similar advantages and be lighter on the wallet and time commitment.) If you have the discipline thing down and prefer to work in a more solitary way, maybe it's not for you. But I can honestly say that in my experience whether or not you have an MFA really makes very little difference to agents and editors. So you should do what feels right to you.

More Suspicious Room

Well, now this is just shameful! I haven't blogged since Thursday. I've been rather frazzled. My work computer - the one for the publishing house I work for, a PC, of course - died Friday and it's been rather preoccupying fixing it. We have truly terrific IT folks but the hard drive was kaput, so there's restoration of data, etc., etc. But hey, a week without a little computer anxiety is like a . . . like a . . . vacation?

Anyway, below is another Suspicious Room audblog. This one is close to the end. What, oh what, has happened to Aunt Rose, potion maker extraordinaire?

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